Skip to main content

My Therapist During One of Our Sessions Said I Need to Be a Child Again

I need to learn to trust people again, I need to let people in, the way kids openheartedly do. He said I have darting eyes, that I need to allow my eyes focus and be calm around people.
Honestly, I really knew he was right. I'm unsteady, a bit unhinged around people(I hide it well, you have to be quite observant to notice it).

People see me and think, "this girl bares it all, she's trusting". Truth is, I do not bare it all because I am trusting, no I am not. I do not bare it all basically to give people hope(it might be one of the reasons). I bare it all because somehow, it helps me exhale.

It takes away that fear that someone would find out my dirty secrets and use them against me. So this is me, taking that ammunition out of your hands. It's no longer a dirty secret. I am #bipolar. And I suffer from that #bipolar a@ffective disorder. So he was really right. I did not get enough time to really be a child.

It's the reason why I seemingly aged beyond my years mentally. Right now, I stopped being a #child at 8. I lost that trust in humans, in the power of l0ve, in life. I left childhood too early. And even with all my "teddy talk" and playfulness, I have never returned. Childhood is a foreign land we long for after we've left.

A blissful place. Try as much as possible to hold on to the bits you can hold on to. Try as much as you can to trap bits of that era even as life tries to drain you of it. Find reasons to laugh more, to play more, to live more, to love more. Hold on to even a little bit of the child in you. As always, this woman loves you all.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Chat With Npower Online Agent Via NPVN Portal to Resolve Any Issue

After verification in all states, N-Power volunteers are faced with different problems, but I’m going to focus the MAJOR problem: Inability to edit profile in case there are errors in their NPVN Portal. Error in N-Power #volunteer profile could impede the volunteers from getting paid, could deter him/her from selecting N-Power tablets etc. If there are mistakes in either your bank account, or BVN, or name, here the tricks you can use to get edit button back to your portal for you effect the correction. On this particular method: HOW TO CHAT WITH #NPOWER ONLINE AGENT has been tested and worked for most people I assisted. They are not always online, right? If you want to chat with anyone of them the best we found to be the best is between 11am-2:45pm during working days/hours: Main thing on how to bypass this.. @Login to their www.npvn.npower.gov.ng. Even if your login details no longer work for you, you can still apply this method to chat with @npower online consultant. If yo...
28 comments
Read more

Payment Issues About Npower Volunteers

Today I believe I can solve the little problem of payment issues concerning the Npower Volunteers team (FG) For now, some state is still working on the list, while some like they have not submitted a there own list. So my advice for some people that are just bringing information that contradict the real thing. Please, I must say some headmistress/headmaster doesn't know anything about the payment that's the simple truth they are telling you what they feel. The moment they started paying other States like Enugu and Anambra it means they have the comprehensive list so people that should be worried now do having issues with account updating.
2 comments
Read more

There are reasons why suicide happens.

Now I won't be writing from just the "something happened to you, you feel sad and bam, let's die" angle. I am including the mental health condition part. So let's start from establishing the fact that I am bipolar. Yes, bipolar mental disorder. Clinically diagnosed. Taking drugs and undergoing therapy. This declaration is important because I see people coming out to say, stop claiming depression and mental health issues so you can sound knowledgeable about an issue. So this one is not a claim, I can send you a copy of my doctor's report. I carry it around with my documents. Ehen, now that that one is clear. Let's talk. You see all of you talking about suicide being selfish don't know what you are saying. You think we wake up and just want to k!ill ourselves, because we don't want to be around you people and bear the pain alone. Because our existence somehow makes your life better. Because you even care about what we are going through? One of ...
Post a Comment
Read more